How to Become a Leader People Respect

Summary

• Accept that feelings of self-doubt and imposter syndrome are normal, even for successful people; I've dealt with them too. Trying to get rid of such feelings is a waste of time.
• Reflecting on past negative feedback, avoid beating yourself up. Instead, channel that energy into finding new solutions.
• Inexperienced leaders often struggle with managing the dichotomy of holding people accountable while being kind. Avoid extremes of ruling with fear or coddling too much.
• Learn to give feedback that encourages and improves performance, rather than punishing. This balance is key to avoiding resentment or false security among team members.
• Developing executive presence comes from experience, which involves speaking up, having difficult conversations, and not shying away from potential failure.
• Soliciting feedback from a wide range of sources is invaluable; sometimes the most insightful feedback comes from those who are not in leadership positions or are two layers removed in the organizational hierarchy.
• Understand that making mistakes is an inherent part of growing and improving as a leader. Mistakes provide the lessons that build the wisdom necessary for great leadership.
• Great leaders have a clear and compelling vision. They communicate this effectively, instilling trust and inspiring others because their team knows they are cared for.

Video

How To Take Action

I would suggest accepting that it's normal to feel self-doubt and imposter syndrome. When you do, don't waste energy trying to get rid of these feelings; instead, focus on your goals.

Reflect on past feedback without being hard on yourself. Use that feedback to find new ways to solve problems. This will help you grow instead of feeling stuck.

If you're leading others, work on balancing being kind and holding your team accountable. Don't be too harsh, but don't coddle people either. This way, they will respect you and feel secure in their roles.

When giving feedback, do it in a way that helps people improve, not just pointing out what's wrong. This builds trust and makes your team better.

To develop a strong leadership presence, you need to speak up and not be afraid of difficult conversations or making mistakes. Even if you mess up, just apologize and keep going.

Ask lots of people for feedback, even those who are not in high positions. You might get some great advice from unexpected places.

Remember, making mistakes is a part of becoming a great leader. Learn from them instead of trying to avoid them.

Lastly, have a clear vision for where you're going and share it with your team in a way that shows you care about them. This makes people believe in you and the direction you're leading them.

In short, focus on learning from feedback, being balanced in leadership, and keep trying even when you fail. Have a vision, and share it with heart. These steps will help you become a better leader without spending a lot of time or money.

Quotes by Leila Hormozi

"Most people that are successful experience feelings of self-doubt and insecurity because they care"

– Leila Hormozi

"The less you beat yourself up, the more you take that same energy and you put it towards finding a new solution, the better you become"

– Leila Hormozi

"What's the biggest mistake of inexperienced leaders? It's actually that they don't know how to manage the dichotomy of holding people accountable but also being kind"

– Leila Hormozi

"Executive presence is a sense of confidence that you only gain through experience"

– Leila Hormozi

"The bigger the goal is and the better you want to be, the more you have to accept that you're gonna have to eat [expletive] to get there"

– Leila Hormozi

Full Transcript

talking about what it takes to become an effective leader and this comes from the years of trial and error that I have had all the mistakes that I have made so that hopefully you don't have to incur them as well most people that are successful experience feelings of self-doubt and insecurity because they care a lot of people ask me how do you overcome imposter syndrome because maybe they're starting a business for the first time they feel inadequate or they feel like they're doubting themselves and what I say is good luck because I still feel that way like I think it's such a misconception that people don't feel these feelings and that's why they accomplish these things I absolutely still have those feelings I've had three businesses now we have acquisition.com so do I believe I could become billionaire I have more belief now than I did before but do I like fully believe it's going to happen I don't think I'll feel that until it happens you need to accept that those things are going to be there and those feelings will be there and trying to get rid of them is a waste of time beating yourself up is not productive and I tended to do that a lot to myself remember like getting glass bowl reviews that were like young dumb Founders sucked it felt like a knife I am working my ass off and I'm not letting the failure stall me the less you beat yourself up the more you take that same energy and you put it towards finding a new solution the better you become what's the biggest mistake of inexperienced leaders it's actually that they don't know how to manage the dichotomy of holding people accountable but also being kind they tend to go really far in one way or the other either they're very mean and they're punishing and they rule with fear and so people do things because they're scared of them not because they respect them because of that you're always in the dark about your company's real problems everybody just does what you say they don't ever express their own opinion they don't ever tell you the truth about what they really think on the other end of the spectrum you have people who are so nice that they hoddle everybody when you coddle people you tend to give people like false sense of security because they're not really in tune with what their performance really looks like an inexperienced leader doesn't know how to meet in the middle I tended to be on like the coddling side in the beginning had one-on-ones with people on the team I would never tell them if I felt like something could improve because I felt like that was punishing I learned how to get feedback in a way that encourages people rather than punishes them and makes them feel less than executive presence is a sense of confidence that you only gain through experience oftentimes when somebody doesn't have executive presence it's because they aren't putting themselves in enough of those situations they're not speaking up enough they're not having enough of the hard conversations they tend to like back off I think most people don't ever gain this because they're too afraid to fail in front of others I mean I do it all the time maybe you know having an off day I see someone say something stupid in front of the team but like I get right back up I will either apologize I'll say oh I missed that oh maybe I meant this instead people with executive presence advocate for themselves and they act in a way where others can feel their sense of self-belief asking people for their Insight is the most valuable thing you can do and the more people you ask you will see the patterning more clearly and it'll become clear to you what you need to do we tend to underestimate somebody's feedback to us if we feel like oh maybe they're not as smart as me or like they don't they're not in my role so they don't know if they're not the CEO of a company they can't give me feedback I think the best feedback I've ever gotten has been from people that are like two layers removed for me in the company I think sometimes the people with the best feedback are the ones who don't spend as much time with you learn the lesson and move on the only way to gain some of these skills is to make the mistakes and experience it for yourself being great doesn't mean not making mistakes in fact to be great you will make more mistakes I used to think I was like an exception to the rule and that I could somehow find a way to be the one who didn't have to make mistakes and then I looked at some of the most iconic leaders over time and they've made huge mistakes you can't ask for the wisdom without incurring the mistakes that create the lessons to gain the wisdom the bigger the goal is and the better you want to be the more you have to accept that you're gonna have to eat to get there there's a lot of things that make someone a great leader you look at like the best leaders in the world they have a clear vision of where they're going and they're able to communicate that Vision to others if I think of the best leaders that I know and that are probably like pretty iconic it's like they have a very big Vision that people get behind people get behind it because they know that they also care about them