How to Know If a Person Is Good for You?
Summary
- When evaluating if a person positively affects your life, consider if they increase or decrease your "stats" – key aspects like health, wealth, happiness, career, relationships, and social standing.
- Ensure you have concrete evidence of the impact someone has had on these areas of your life.
- Reflect on your health since meeting someone; ask whether you have become healthier or less healthy as a result of the relationship.
- Analyze the effect of the relationship on your wealth, determining if it has made achieving financial goals easier or more difficult.
- Judge the influence on your happiness, contemplating if the person has made it simpler or more complicated for you to feel content.
- Assess the impact on your career, whether the individual is helping to smooth the path to your goals or causing obstacles.
- Consider the effect on your other relationships, whether the person supports them or hinders your connections.
- Look at your social standing and notice if constant fighting in the relationship is affecting how others view you negatively or positively.
- Prioritize which areas are most crucial to you by starring the stats that matter most, recognizing that the importance of increases in certain areas may outweigh the drawbacks in others.
Video
How To Take Action
I would suggest starting with a simple list to understand how people in your life are affecting your "stats" – your health, wealth, happiness, career, relationships, and social standing. Here’s a way to put this into action without spending too much time or money:
- Health: Write down if you are more active, eating better, and feeling stronger since knowing someone. If not, they might be making your health worse.
- Wealth: Think about if you save more money or if you're spending unwisely because of them. Good relationships should help you reach your money goals, not stop them.
- Happiness: Ask yourself if you smile and laugh more with this person. If they bring more stress than joy, that's a sign they might not be good for your happiness.
- Career: Consider if they help you work better or give you ideas to succeed. If they distract you from your job, they may be a roadblock to your career growth.
- Relationships: Reflect if they encourage you to spend time with family and friends. Someone who helps your other relationships is a keeper.
- Social Standing: Notice if fights with them are making people see you in a bad light. It's important to have someone who makes you look and feel good in front of others.
After making your list, star the "stats" that are most important to you. Maybe only a couple areas have improved, but they could be the ones you care about the most. By keeping track of these measures, you'll see clearly who is good for you and who might be holding you back. Remember, what you need from relationships will change over time, so it's a good idea to do this check every now and then.
Quotes by Leila Hormozi
"Does this person increase or decrease my stats?"
– Leila Hormozi
"You must have supporting evidence that they have increased or decreased your stats."
– Leila Hormozi
"Have you become healthier or less healthy since entering a relationship with this person?"
– Leila Hormozi
"Has being in the relationship made it easier or harder to achieve your wealth goals?"
– Leila Hormozi
"Is that person lubricating your ability to achieve your goals or are they adding friction?"
– Leila Hormozi
Full Transcript
does this person increase or decrease my stats this is a way to quantify if a person makes your life better or worse there's a caveat here you must have supporting evidence that they have increased or decreased your stats the first one is Health have you become healthier or less healthy since entering a relationship with this person whatever it means to you the second one wealth has being in the relationship made it easier or harder to achieve your wealth goals third one is happiness has being in that relationship made it easier or harder for you to be happy career is that person lubricating your ability to achieve your goals or are they adding friction relationships have they been a supporter of the relationships you want or do they make it harder for you and then the last one social standing if you're in a relationship and you're constantly fighting and everybody knows does that increase or decrease your social standing what I would do is I would go through and I would star the areas that are most important to you so you could go through that list and you be like oh my gosh they've only increased two areas of my life but it might be that those two areas are more important to you than all the other areas combined and everything else you can kind of forget
