How to Know if Someone’s Loyal

Summary

• Loyalty is shown by what people do behind closed doors when they think nobody is watching.
• You can't know if someone is loyal if they never have the chance to make a different choice.
• To know if a husband is loyal, he must face the opportunity to be unfaithful and choose not to.
• To see if an employee is loyal, they need to have the chance to take another job or do side work and choose to stay.
• True friendship loyalty is tested when a friend has the chance to talk behind your back but chooses not to.
• Loyalty is all about what happens when you're not present, rather than what people do in front of you.
• To determine someone's loyalty, consider what they do when you're not there.

Video

How To Take Action

I would suggest implementing ways to observe loyalty in subtle, low-cost ways. Start paying attention to how people act when they think you aren't noticing. This doesn't require any extra time or money, just mindfulness.

For entrepreneurs, a good way of doing this with employees is by creating situations where they have choices. For example, informally mention opportunities at other companies to see if they show interest in staying with you. You don't have to push them out the door, just create awareness that options exist.

A practical step for small business owners is to encourage an open environment where people feel comfortable discussing side projects or other interests. This helps you see who is transparent and loyal to your business without extra expense.

For personal growth, test your friendships by sharing smaller, less critical secrets or sensitive information to see if it stays confidential. This approach is low-risk and doesn't require much effort but can reveal a lot about a friend's loyalty.

When evaluating loyalty in partners, reflect on scenarios where they could make different choices. Have calm and honest discussions about boundaries and see if they respect them, even in hypothetical situations. This helps build trust without needing to put your relationship at risk.

In essence, low-cost, high-value actions revolve around creating opportunities for choices and observing people's reactions. This will give you insight into their loyalty without any added stress or expense.

Full Transcript

I think that loyalty is what people do behind closed doors when they think nobody is watching so if a husband for example is never presented with the opportunity to sleep with another woman do you even know if he's loyal if an employee is never presented with the opportunity to take another job or do side work how do you ever know that they're loyal if a friend is never presented with an opportunity to talk behind your back how do you know that they're loyal I think loyalty happens when you are not there it's what happens behind your back not in front of you and so if you want to know if somebody's loyal ask yourself what they do when you're not there