Regretting the Past is Pointless
Summary
- I learned that dwelling on the past won't help me become who I want to be. It's important to focus on the future and set goals for myself.
- At one point, I was stuck talking about my difficult past and it was like reopening old wounds repeatedly. I realized that this doesn't aid growth or healing.
- It was a turning point for me when a therapist told me to focus on the present and future instead of continuously revisiting past issues. This advice was incredibly freeing for me.
- I struggled with feelings of shame about things from my past, like my weight and getting arrested. However, I've learned that these feelings didn't help me improve or achieve my goals.
- It's vital to let go of shame from past events, as it doesn't contribute to becoming better or happier. Focus on the future and take actions that lead you toward your goals.
Video
How To Take Action
I would suggest implementing a focus on the future rather than dwelling on the past. Start by setting clear goals for yourself. This means writing down what you want to achieve and creating small, actionable steps to get there. It's important to be specific and realistic so that you can see progress over time.
A good way to do this is by practicing mindfulness and staying present. Spend a little time each day reflecting on what you can do now to move towards your goals. This could be as simple as dedicating 10 minutes a day to learn a new skill or improving your mindset.
It's crucial to let go of any shame related to past events. Understand that your past doesn't define your future. Remind yourself that everyone makes mistakes, and it's okay to learn from them and move on. If you catch yourself revisiting old wounds, gently bring your focus back to your goals and what you can control today.
For entrepreneurs or small business owners, focus on strategies that drive your business forward. Whether it's brainstorming new ideas, refining your offerings, or connecting with potential customers, these actions are much more beneficial than reliving past failures.
Lastly, surround yourself with positive influences and seek out inspiration from others who have overcome their past. Hearing how others have shifted their focus can motivate and reinforce your new mindset.
Full Transcript
I went to therapy and the therapist was always asking me tell me about your mom we can't move on and you can't get better unless you talk about your mom and every time I would just go into the session and I would just start talking about this these terrible things that happened and how I felt it would reopen this wound over and over and over again but what do you do with that I ended up going and seeing a different therapist and she was like I don't want to talk about your mom she's like you're an adult what are you going to do about it it was like the best thing anybody could have ever said to me I remember thinking my mind I was like thank God I'm so sick of talking about this I'm so sick of talking I don't like talking about the past I have a lot of things from my past that I could consider shameful and I could dwell on and I did for a period of time you know I felt really ashamed about like how fat I was how many times I got arrested that didn't help me it didn't make me a better person it didn't help me hit my goals people ask me now they'll be like can you tell me about I don't even think about I don't even think about yesterday I'm so focused on the future and going forward you're not going to become the person you want to become by dwelling on the things that happened a week ago