STOP trying to be happy

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STOP trying to be happy.

Summary

  • When I was a teenager, I thought I had anger issues and wasn’t a nice person, believing these traits were problems.
  • In college, I was taught to pursue my purpose and passion, which I eagerly embraced, but it led to no progress in my life.
  • Looking back, I see the value in embracing and using negative emotions like anger and pain as motivation to create the life I want.
  • Negative experiences shouldn't be seen as bad; they constitute half of life and can propel us toward success if used correctly.
  • Many top Olympic medalists and successful figures like Steve Jobs and Michael Jordan used their dislike for losing or self-created suffering as motivation, rather than seeking happiness.
  • Having a purpose or loving what you do is not a prerequisite for success; taking consistent action toward wealth regardless of motivation is key.
  • You can use negative emotions like pain and anger as motivation – it's okay to do great things with 'bad' motivation.
  • Doing things you dislike can be a path to discovering purpose, as long as the discomfort of those tasks is less than the discomfort of not progressing.
  • The three things the wealthiest individuals have in common are a big goal, immense fear of inadequacy, and impulse control to remain focused on their goals.
  • Dealing with tasks you hate doing in your work or business is necessary, as long as the pain of moving forward is less than the pain of staying where you are.
  • When working on something such as writing my book, the fear of it not being the best it could be is a strong motivator to keep revising and improving.
  • "I will not do my best, I will do what is required" is a motto I live by, as it demands you go beyond what you think is your best.
  • Remember, it's the outcome that people see, not the motivation behind it – you're free to use whatever drives you, even if it's not founded in passion or purpose.
  • If you are struggling to find passion, do not use that as an excuse to avoid working toward success.

Video

How To Take Action

I would suggest embracing your negative emotions. Don't see anger or pain as problems. You can use them as motivation to work harder. When you feel these negative feelings, remember they can push you forward.

Focus on the actions you need for success, even if you don't love them. It's okay to work towards wealth without being passionate about every step. Use the discomfort from tasks you dislike as a push to keep going – as long as the pain of not progressing is worse.

Set a big goal for yourself. Even if your purpose is as simple as "don't be broke," that's fine. Remember, the wealthiest people have big goals, fears of not being enough, and control their impulses to stay focused.

Do what is required, not just what you think is your best. If you don't love writing a book or doing a job, think about the outcome. Work through the revisions or tough tasks by thinking about avoiding failure, not just reaching your perfect vision.

Finally, don't wait for passion to start. If you're struggling to find it, don't let that be an excuse. Get to work, use whatever motivation you have, and take action to be successful.

Remember, people see your success, not what drove you to it. Your drive can be anything that works for you, even if it's not founded in happiness or purpose.

Quotes by Alex Hormozi

"If you are not using the half of your life as energy or motivation to create the life you want, then you're at a huge disadvantage"

– Alex Hormozi

"You can do good [ __ ] with bad motivation"

– Alex Hormozi

"The road to Heaven is paved with bad intentions"

– Alex Hormozi

"I will not do my best, I will do what is required"

– Alex Hormozi

"What people care about is the outcome, not why you do it"

– Alex Hormozi

Full Transcript

that you want and on this side your family gets kidnapped and if you don't do something they will kill them all which of those motivates you more right now in this video when I was 15 16 17 I was a pretty angry kid I thought that I had all these issues I would tell people I have anger issues I'm not a nice person I would tell people those things because I believe those things to be true and I saw them as problems and then I went to college and in college it's all propaganda of people who are teaching who've never actually done work in a real economy ever they're all tenured they don't live in reality they tell everyone they should pursue their purpose and their passion and the things that they love and I ate it up and so I read all these books on pod psychology I watched all these TED talks and the problem was I didn't make any progress and I felt like there was something even more wrong with me because I didn't feel any of that stuff I wish I could go back and tell myself dude all the stuff they're saying is just not true like you don't need any of that you can embrace the fact that you are angry you can embrace the fact that you feel like you are in pain and you can use that to make the life that you want you don't have to use the lovey-dovey purpose passion to build the life that you want to build what it does is it tells people that having a negative emotional experience is a bad thing but half of your life is below average by definition and so if you are not using the half of your life as energy or motivation to create the life you want then you're at a huge disadvantage they interviewed the top Olympic medalists and they found that they don't actually love winning they hate losing when they win they experience relief not Euphoria if you look at Steve Jobs he wasn't some happy-go-lucky dude who was like man I just want to make the world a better place he was a tough dude to work for but he created Something Beautiful from that pain MJ you look at Kobe they had imaginary situations that they created in their minds to create more suffering in their own lives to motivate and uses fuel imagine you have this big vision for your life that you want and on this side your family gets kidnapped and if you don't do something they will kill them all which of those motivates you more right now in this video probably the one with your family getting kidnapped it's not trying to harness a lovey-dovey feeling it's harnessing pain felt like I had experienced more pain than I had good I saw it as a disadvantage I saw it as something that I had to overcome I didn't have this big purpose I didn't have this thing that I loved I didn't have this thing I was passionate about and if I could have just skipped all of that and started the moment I accepted that it was okay to be angry what wasn't okay was not doing anything about it while I procrastinated by trying to find purpose jumping from thing to thing to thing trying to find the thing that really lit my fire and just accepted that it was totally okay to work my face off in disgust from my current circumstance and who I was then I would have gotten to where I wanted to go much faster so many people are believing a lie they have to be happy they have to have purpose passion for what they're doing in order to get out of their situation they think that they are poor because they don't have passion that is false you were poor because you're not doing the activities that makes you rich and you can fuel those activities whatever way you damn well please and so if you are somebody who is more motivated by the dark side then Lean Into the Dark Side unlike the saying the road to hell is paved with good intentions the equal opposite of that is the road to Heaven is paved with bad intentions you can do good [ __ ] with bad motivation and when I say bad I mean negative experiences pain anger Etc I still have tons of motivation from that side you can use that negative fuel hit it on speed dial every time you're confronted with that thing that you don't want to do you push through it and what happens you do that enough times you start to get good at the thing you start seeing the result of work that has compounded and start to see a purpose or start to see a bigger Vision the big vision for Alex's life until maybe four years ago was don't be broke what was your mission with Jim my mission was to stop being poor there are elements of [ __ ] that I do that I absolutely love but there is tons of [ __ ] that I do every day that I [ __ ] hate I just don't hate it more than I hate the alternative and the richest people in the world they all say it's not about the money because if it's about the money you stop the moment you have enough the people with the wealthiest in the world have the three things in common they have the big goal they have massive fears about never being enough and then they have impulse control to stay on goal and oftentimes that impulse control comes from right as you approach the guard rail looking over the edge and imagining what it would be like to have your friends tell you that you were a failure have them laugh behind your back or talk down about you or have your parents when they're introducing you as their fun-loving kid you know he's still figuring himself out that is what would crush me the boring [ __ ] that you have to do is not fun Jeff basis talks about overhead in business there's tons of things that you have to do and be willing to do that you do not enjoy the question is whether you do not enjoy them more then you do not enjoy the pain that you are going away from as long as the pain of moving forward is less than the pain of going back and the pain that you imagine from not taking the action that you know should be taking then you can use that energy as the single fuel that you can stay on path for an extended period of time I'm writing my book right now I'm on the 11th [ __ ] draft like there is no feeling that makes me more sick than the idea that I could have done more the pain of the idea of that book not doing well or that book leading to people being like I don't think he tried as hard that is the thing that hurts so much more than going from the top yet again to make another video to make an another article to make another short to make another [ __ ] chapter revision yet again so that when I do launch it I think to myself I literally exhausted every option on this one of the sayings that I live by is that I will not do my best I will do what is required and the difference between what your best is and what is required is the difference between what you think your real best is and what your actual best is and what your actual best is is the thing that you would do to prevent everyone you know from dying what people care about is the outcome what you put out in the world now why you do it what fuels you that's your business and so if you are in one of these situations and you can't find that purpose you can't find that passion cool but it doesn't give you permission to not be successful

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